Wei worked as a registrar in the ED of a big metropolitan hospital. She had a Masters of Public Health and had passed all her emergency medicine exams. She was accomplished, well regarded, and happy about her work. She was looking forward to being a consultant and thought positively about her future. She saw lots of exciting options for her career. Sadly, although her career was thriving, she was socially isolated and extremely lonely. 

Wei lived with her brother, an engineer who was sometimes away for work. Combined with her shift work, they could go weeks without seeing each other. Their parents lived overseas. Wei talked with them several times a week. Although she had good relationships with the other members of her family, they were not accessible to her. She was very often lonely but didn't tell her parents because she didn't want them to worry. She didn't share much about her work with anyone except her immediate colleagues. Wei had never socialised with them, having only been there for nine months after doing a rural rotation the year before. Her friends from university were spread all around the country now. Some of her colleagues had young children. Wei often told me in coaching how the people around her were busy, this was her way of explaining why she didn't connect with them outside her work hours.

She was anxious about making new friends and told me that, "Everyone has their own lives". Wei maintained her isolation and loneliness by focusing on work, minimising her need for company and connection, and discounting her colleagues as potential options. As a result, she increased the risk of damaging her mental health and reducing her wellbeing over the longer term. 

Many of the reasons for Wei's isolation were, if not created by her, able to be solved by her. She just needed to see this for herself. After raising her social isolation in conversation with her, I asked Wei about her previous rotation, where she had competed in triathlons. She also told me she had always wanted to try out amateur theatre after being in a play at school. These two ideas acted as a springboard for Wei. Neither of these activities were immediately possible but exposing them as ideas helped her to take some action in the service of her own wellbeing. 

After sharing some of what we had discussed on the phone with her friend in Singapore, she found enough courage to join a local touch-football team. Conversations in coaching and with her remote friend gave her the support she needed to take care of herself better. This one step led to lots of others, including inviting one of her colleagues to join her football team. A few months later, Wei sent an email to her previous supervisor at the regional hospital where she worked the year before. He was delighted to hear from her and encouraged her to keep in touch. Wei has made a commitment to herself to do so. 

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